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Cusp

by Pastel

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1.
Dream 1 :'-) 01:40
I had a dream that we were in my bed. You asked me to lay my head down on your chest. I felt safe, the way that you held me, and I tried so hard to hide the tear rolling down my cheek. We fell asleep and I woke up from my dream.
2.
Do you want to hold hands at the park six feet apart? We could walk, we could talk, or get lost. I don't know how to act, what to say, what to do. All I know is that I want to do it with you.
3.
Focus, etc. 02:54
Snapping my fingers while pace all around the place I know that I'm a wreck, just look at my face. I just want to focus. I'm feeling so anxious. Can’t think, or can’t stop. I know I get overwhelmed quick. I can't do a lot of little shit.
4.
Peaches 02:38
I know that I'm not perfect the way that diamonds are. And I don't have money or a fancy car. But my skin breaks like a peach on a Summer's day and I think that's kind of beautiful in its own way. … Is it fucked up to want to be loved this much?
5.
I watched the sunlight ballet dance across your morning face. I hope I didn't wake you with the way my heart tends to race, like a child. I wish I could stop seeing that face when I'm dreaming. I wish I could stop seeing remnants of that face when I look in the mirror. I know I was cold then, but I was just 18. Sometimes I wish you would reach out and just try to call me. I know that it's hard to feel like you're not enough to ever be loved, when you're so loved, and you're so loved.
6.
I had a vision that I'm at the ocean. My feet through the tint of the water are golden. And my little belly hangs out with my back to the sand. There's a small rock kept safe in the palm of my hand. I can't tell if I'm myself now, or myself as a child. I can only look forwards backwards and smile. I watch the sunset from across the land and I try to grab it with a reach of my hand. But it's too far for me. I guess some things aren't meant to be.

credits

released November 20, 2020

All instruments on Track 6 (except acoustic guitar) by Rishabh Bhan Singh

Mastered by Ian W. Norris

Art by James Paris

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Pastel Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

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